Scrambled eggs, with a little semen on the side

      I eventually got used to all the needles.  Heck, I'd gouge myself in the eyeballs twice a day if it meant I could get pregnant.  It just became my new normal.  Thank God, I got used to them since I started seeing an acupuncturist the week of my egg retrieval.  I wish I had a picture of that.  I laid in a quiet room with chinese music and had needles from the tips of my toes to my ear lobes.  I was told to relax and "become one" with the table I was laying on in nothing but my panties.  Steve, my acupuncturist told me, very confidently that I WOULD become pregnant.  I loved that statement.  I think that's why I continued to fork out what little was left in our bank account to continue our sessions throughout my IVF treatments.  To be honest, it was a little uncomfortable, but very relaxing.  It helped me find my center and helped me to channel my inner fertility goddess.  Ok, girls, I'm totally kidding.  But it was relaxing.  I'll never forget when I was casually telling my friend about my acupuncture session that week, she told me I had lost my mind.  She said I was completely nuts for going to him, I just laughed.  But I cried the whole way home from our lunch date.  Mostly because I was hormonal I guess.  She never would have made that comment if she knew it would hurt my feelings so much.  I was already aware that all the measures I was going to to become a mom, were extreme and considered crazy to many.  I think what broke my heart was that she actually said what I'm sure everyone else was thinking.  Maybe I was nuts, but I'd go to any length for my future babies.  And I was gearing up for a big week.  My egg retrieval surgery...

       It was harvest time. And I'm not talking about all those beautiful fall colors either, ladies.  I'm talking about the gathering and harvesting of my eggs.  If you read last week's blog, I'm sure you remember me talking about my husband getting an orgasm while I was getting prepped for surgery.  Long story short, he put his stuff in a cup and took it to the doctor.  She used it to inject inside each of my eggs...all 33 of them that they retrieved.  You know, the process of conception that typically happens within a bedroom.  Sometimes romantically with candles and music.  Ours happened a little more untraditional.  I was still knocked out from the anesthesia,  their were half a dozen doctors present, and get this...Cody wasn't even in the room.  Can you believe that? Pretty crazy, huh?  When  I finally woke up from surgery they told me they had retrieved 33 eggs.  That is a crazy high number!  Most of the time, successful IVF patients get 12-15.  Little did I know at the time, I had hyper stimulated.  This happened because my body went into overdrive due to the injections and produced a very high number of eggs.  This can sometimes be very dangerous to your body.  I was still a little droggy from the anesthesia.  But I was aware of one thing...my ovaries were pissed off.
        My doctor told me before I was released to go home that most patients recovered within 48-72 hours.  Ok, stop right there.  Let's take the term "most patients" and throw it out the window.  I call bullsh*t.  Most patients are in their mid thirties and produce the "typical" number of eggs, around 12-15.  I felt fierce pains in my abdomen and looked 4-5 months pregnant, due to my ovaries being so swollen.  Those poor girls were angry and had been through the ringer.  But let's be honest, I was a little upset at them too for not being functional and doing their job in the first place ;).   I also wanted to hold my pee for hours each time, because it hurt so badly each time I went.  Luckily, we decided to spend the next week at my lovely Aunt Becky's house.  She was such a blessing during that time.  Since I had to stay close to a hospital, she helped take care of me while Cody went to work. Thank God for her and her huge, lovely bathtub with jets....and a flat screen.  She has always spoiled me too, so that didn't hurt anything.  I was able to rest really well there.  So that made the pain and inconvenient bloating a little more bareable.  And the fact that my transfer was only a few days away.  Yay!  We had waited so long for that day and couldn't hardly wait for the moment we could transfer 2 of our sweet little embryos.
      The day after the transfer we got the call we had been waiting for.  The call to inform us how many of our fertilized eggs had turned into viable embryos.  12!  We got a dozen embryos.  My IVF nurse must have thought I would be upset by the news, because they'd initially told us the "typical" number per cycle was 3-5.  "But don't freak out," she said.  "You won't have to use all of them."  My heart sunk when she said that.  It sounded like she was comparing my embryos, my babies, to some extra condiments they threw in the bag at Taco Bell.  We didn't have to use them.  We could just toss them when we were done.  Why isn't everyone born with morals?  I hoped and prayed that my husband and family would understand the reality that I would plan to use each and every one.  I know that's a crazy reality to grasp, but God wouldn't have allowed that many to take, if he didn't plan on us using them. But that wasn't all, they had the results of my bloodwork... and it wasn't good.  Due to me hyperstimualting, my Estaraidol levels were over 10,000, which is scary high.  They told me once again, not to freak out, but I would likely be hospitalized.  She told me to stay somewhere close to their ER and to drink as much as possible.  And get this girls, my transfer would probably be cancelled.  Shut the front door...you've gotta be kidding me.  I have just put my body through all of this to get my transfer cancelled.  I was overwhelmed by all this news.  So I did what any woman would do.  Prayed for a miracle and...I googled.
      Anyone that knows my family, knows that they are pretty popular in the drama department.  As soon as Aunt Becky began to read the scary stuff we pulled up on google, she freaked out a little too. She began scouring her cabinets and fridge to find every grain of salt she could possibly find.  Salt was supposed to help for some reason I cannot remember.  The fear was that my blood was too thin and I could throw a blood clot with little to no warning, which could be fatal.  So sitting at the bar in her kitchen, she forced a rather large bowl of olives and pickles at me while Cody was pouring the gatorades.   "Eat these right now, sister. You don't wanna die, do you?"   I laughed and agreed to eat them until my face swelled up from all the salt.  Another wonderful family trait ;).  Then Becky did the unthinkable, what she was told not to do...she called my momma to spill the beans.  That little hooch can never, ever keep a secret ;). Did I mention my momma is dramatic?  She is wonderful, supportive, loving, and concerned.  But, oh...so dramatic.  And she loves google too.  If you could imagine, she freaked out as well.  I talked her off the edge and assured her that I'd be just fine.   But I'll never forget how worried I actually was.  The only person that knew that was Cody.  I didn't break down in front of anyone else, because I didn't want them to worry more or know how weak I really was.  What would I do if I died and left all of these babies behind without a momma.  I just prayed and cried, and yet again, God gave me a peace to just be still and trust him, so that's just what I did...

      Once again, I want to thank all of you fabulous ladies for you support and feedback for my blog! I appreciate all the sweet emails and fertility stories I have had the honor of reading.  I am so glad God is using this to be an inspiration to others.  Just a quick update on our current cycle.  I went for bloodwork this week and we are hopefully roughly 5 weeks away from our next transfer.  My estrogen levels are dropping lower every day.  Though, they don't make me feel the best, I am very anxious and excited to be transferring 2 more of our 7 precious remaining embryos.  As we get closer, I will be talking about it more and sharing photos and videos of the process! As always, please SHARE! And tune in next Monday to see where our story continues...
   

The Art of Romance...and Reproduction

       So, we did it.  We called Nashville Fertility clinic the next week and confirmed that we were ready to begin our IVF the next month.  Shortly after, we went to a lengthy IVF class along with about 8 other couples who were about to begin too.  Most of them seemed to be feelings of excitement and anxiety.  We were given instruction on how to properly administer injections, injection sites, blood work and ultrasound appointments, ect.  But Cody and I were very shocked by some of the questions that were asked by a few of the couples in the room.  One question that was asked will never leave my  mind..."We really only want a boy, that's why we want to do this."  The answer to that question is...yes.  For a good chunk of extra money, you can choose the sex of your child with IVF.  But we both agreed that we feel that is totally wrong and playing God.  We just wanted a baby.  Whether it be one, or five, or ten, or...twelve.  We wanted a healthy pregnancy that resulted in a healthy baby/babies.  That is the reason I believe IVF can get a bad wrap.  However, in most cases, the people who do it are just like us.  Just desperate to be parents.  At the end of the class, we signed all of our IVF waivers and ordered all of our expensive medications/injections.  I'd never been more excited for a shot in all my life! All those shots and appointments meant we were one step closer to our dream! On the way out the door, our IVF nurses and doctors warned the husbands of the hormones that would soon consume their wives emotions.  They suggested a little extra patience and romance throughout the next 6 weeks.   Little did we know, romance and reproduction didn't exactly go hand in hand.

         To say Infertility takes a toll on the romance department is a bit of an understatement.  It's like saying Kim Kardashian is just a little bit curvy.  Before all the trips to the fertility specialists, there was timed sex.  If you know what the term "timed sex" means, you probably know this much.  There isn't anything sexy about it.  Anytime you have to check your temperature, count days and assess  your (ahem) bodily fluids in your lady parts.  I mean,  seriously,  need I say more.  Does any of that sound sexy?  "Hurry!  Get in here honey! You've got 48 hours to get me pregnant, I am ovulating!"  Then afterwards you prop yourself up with pillows or stand on your head for an hour...sound familiar?   All that ever got me was a bad headache.  If only it was that easy.  However, when you decide to enter the land of IVF,  that all goes to another level . Well, sister, let me tell you something else that isn't sexy.  The moment they hand your husband a cup, a brown paper bag, and direct him to a cold little office full of dirty magazines. (Which I swore he never looked at, by the way ;) ) While we are getting poked, prodded, and shot up with an unreal amount of hormones...our hubbys are given a cup.  A cup to you know,  go give a sample of their "stuff" in.   My husband is going to kill me. I mean, I'll give him a little credit.  I know it's gotta be hard being put on the spot and all.  But while they're off... getting off, we are getting prepped for surgery.  A very painful one at that, at least in my case it was.  Give me surgery, give him an orgasm...seem fair?  Potato, potahto.  Now, let's explain.  They had to have a sperm sample in order to fertilize my lovely eggs.  All 33 of them to be exact, but I'm getting a little ahead of myself. ;)
       When you jump into an IVF cycle, it consumes you like Pinterest at Christmastime.  That's all you can think about.  You eat, breathe, sleep, and discuss all things IVF.   I began to talk IVF all the time.  I had a baby on the brain and I became a little obsessed.  And our family and friends were awesome.  They acted just as excited as I was, but I know they were secretly thinking..."for the love of God, woman, stop talking about your flipping ovaries!"  And thank you, girls, for not saying it out loud, because I'm pretty sure the ugly cry would have shown up again if you had.  But, it was in those moments that I fell in love with my husband all over again.  I know that there were moments when he just wanted to watch ESPN without hearing the terms sperm motility or egg count.  He always had open ears, and patiently discussed it with me 24/7.  Though the condition of my ovaries, my egg count, and the motility of his sperm weren't your typical topics of table conversation, it was at our house.  Gotta keep your marriage hot and interesting, ya know what I mean?!?  Nightime is when things really got interesting.
      Earlier in the day the UPS man brought a very large and expensive package that we'd been impatiently waiting for.  I couldn't wait to get everything started that night. So when Cody got home from work later,  I tried to prepare myself for what was to come.  I bent over the bed and ended up screaming at him before we were even finished.  Stop right there,  I bet you're thinking I'm referring to some kinky scene out of a 50 shades book or something.  Not quite, sister.  This is a Christian blog.  Get your mind out of the gutter.  And besides, I am so not into that whole pain thing.  If I was, I may have enjoyed those intramuscular progesterone shots I had to get in my hip nightly.  The screaming? It was me yelling at the hubs for laughing hysterically at a Jimmy Fallon skit , all while administrating a needle in my hip.  He thought he was a pro or something I guess.  I don't care how good you are, NEVER, laugh while giving me a shot, unless you want to face the wrath of a very hormonal wife.  But he was a good husband and cuddled and gave me warm compresses and massage afterwards.  But, I really think he might have been a little scared to go to sleep with all those needles in the house, if he hadn't of.  ;)
      No matter how awkward or unconventional our love story may be, I wouldn't change a thing about it.  He had held me when I cried for no reason at all.  He has rubbed my head when I had headaches from all the Lupron in my system.  He has cleaned up my puke and helped me in and out of bed after surgery ( which I'll tell more about next week.) And most of all, he has always reminded me from the beginning that I was born to be a mommy and he would go to any lengths to make that dream reality.  I love my man and our love story!

Once, again, I am so overwhelmed with the love and support you all have shown for this blog! I am loving doing it!  Message me anytime to discuss all things IVF or infertility, that's what I am here for!  The next chapter will come next week so stay tuned! And as always, please SHARE! 

WITH LOVE AND BABY DUST,

ANDI

I.V.F. and G.O.D.

       First off, I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your awesome response to this blog. I was brought to tears by some of the messages I received about their own personal struggles with infertility.  This makes my heart happy to know it has helped lift spirits.  I LOVE hearing from readers and appreciate all the SHARES and sweet COMMENTS.  I can't thank you enough.  I hope this blog continues to reach more each week.  I hear so many blogger talk about preparing and rough drafts.  You won't find that here.  I sit down at the laptop and pour my heart out while typing.  It is still surreal that I am sharing this with the whole world, but I am so glad that I am.  Next week my blog will be all prettified!  I am currently working with a blog designer to make these posts better organized as I blog weekly.  This week the post is sort of long, so I apologize in advance! Anyways, I'll shut up now so you can read the next story of many stories...


       "You have less than a 1 % chance of ever having a child...in your lifetime.  IVF is your only option to ever have children on your own."  My response? My jaw hit the floor and the waterworks began.  I cried.  A lot.  Not one of those sad, soft cries with a few silent tears rolling down each cheek.  One of those violent, ugly cries.  Come on girls, you know the ones.  The loud sobs...can't breathe, can't speak.  Tears, snot, drool, mascara...everywhere.  I'll just say it, I was a hot mess! At that moment, my doctor probably wish that she'd never met me.  I don't think she was prepared for all that drama right before her lunch hour.  (She can thank my mama for all that drama, haha! ) She tried to sympathize but it did no good.  My emotional self was too far gone. My hubby couldn't even console me.  I went to the bath room and vommited from being so upset. 
      I can't say I didn't see it coming. We started trying to conceive on our honeymoon.  Ahhh, ignorance is bliss.  I looked for my monthly visitor to take a hike each month so I could finally see those 2 pink lines.  But she was a witch, and always showed up unwanted. I had a major obsession with those stupid sticks anyways.  We should've bought a stock in those things.  I loved buying pregnancy tests, but they didn't love me back.  All I ever saw was rejection and a big fat negative.  After months with no luck, I felt in my gut that something wasn't right.  So what did I do? I lied to my doctor and said we'd actually been trying longer than we had.  I know, I know.  Lying is wrong and I shouldn't have done it.  But I am telling my story, so I couldn't leave that part out. ;) The doctor finally gave in and started the first round of tests after I insisted that they take me serious.  Long story short, we had lots of lots of tests done.  I also tried LOTS and LOTS of different meds.  Clomid, Femera, dye ran through my tubes, vitamins, you name it.  NOTHING seemed to work.  After a series of different doctors and ultrasounds,  Dr. Whitworth finally gave us the verdict, that we subconsciously already had in the back of our minds.  "Less than 1 % without IVF."  
      It was a long drive home, poor Cody.  I spent most of the drive acting like a crazy person and busting into tears every 2 minutes.  He rubbed my back and assured me that everything would work out in God's timing.  Honestly, that isn't what I wanted to hear.  What I wanted to hear was that I would get pregnant the old fashioned way, quick and painless.  I knew God was in control, and his will is perfect.  But did I mention I'm a control freak at times?  I selfishly wanted things my way.   I was feeling sorry for myself and wallowing in self pity.  We finally arrived home and it was a friday, which meant it was time for Cody to go to work at his parent's restaurant.  Did I mention I was feeling sorry for myself? And now I was having to do it alone..."Dang you, Harpers Catfish! Can't you see I need my husband?  I need him to baby me, rub my back, and  curl up and cry with my not so fertile, pitiful self!"  Not really, girls...I love Harpers ;).  Just not that weekend.  Anyways, he left and I was alone, so I cried some more.  My uterus ached.  I sat down in the beautiful rocker my parents had given me shortly after getting married.  I wanted nothing more than a baby to rock in that chair. But my arms were empty and that "nursery" was nothing more than a spare room.  
      I knew I couldn't bear this burden alone, so I began to pray.  Instead of praying to be pregnant right now...I began to pray for God's will to be done.  I prayed for him to take control of the situation like only he could do.  I knew no matter how badly or selfishly I wanted to, I couldn't control this.  I knew that he had a beautiful plan for our lives, and I had to totally trust in him.  You see I was impatient and selfish,  I wanted a baby and I wanted it now!  I would constantly see women out and think to myself, "How can she have a baby and I cannot?"  But life doesn't work like that.  It is not my job to understand how this world works.  We are not supposed to understand, but we are supposed to whole heartedly trust in our heavenly father and his plans for us.  God finally gave me a peace after many prayers.  A peace that I cannot quite explain in words.  It made me be still and stop obsessing about what I didn't have.  It made me stop feeling sorry for myself and realize that the world was not ending, even if it felt like it at the time. 
      We broke down and told our friends and family what the doctors said.  Most everyone was super supportive and sweet, especially our parents.  However, we did get some pretty hurtful and dumb responses.  Some of which included..."Maybe this is God's way of telling you he doesn't want you to have kids."  "Why don't you just adopt."  "Really, why spend that money on IVF, when you can go buy a car with that money?"  First off, I never believe God intended for me not to have kids.  It says in the bible," Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act."  Would you tell a cancer patient, "Don't do chemo, because maybe God wants you to die?" God gives people resources, doctors, science, and medicine to help cure horrible diseases and medically intervene in other situations.  And in my case, help people to have babies.  Yes, adoption is awesome.  I think it takes a special person to do it, and I applaud all of which have done so.  But is it wrong for me to desire to experience pregnancy?  I wanted to feel those kicks, I want to watch my belly grow each month.  I want my boobs to hurt and I'll happily puke every morning from morning sickness.  And I would MUCH rather go broke to have the chance at being a mommy... more than anything money could buy.  Yes, it is a hefty price to pay.  But, people buy new vehicles every day for that amount, and babies are much cuter. :)  Regardless of what anyone thought, we had our mind made up that we would eventually do IVF and pray for God's guidance.  Those next couple weeks, it seems like everywhere I went all I saw was strollers in every shape and size.  I'd be lying if I said it wasn't crushing to my soul.  Even though I knew IVF was in our future, the future and all the obstacles we'd have to overcome was still scary.
      When I thought of the term, IVF, one person came to mind.  My friend Danielle.  I first met Danielle years ago when my mom started photographing her beautiful, curly headed triplets. I am a big believer in fate and the fact that everything happens for a reason.  I know that God put her in my life to help me along on this journey.  Her triplets, along with their little sister were all conceived using IVF.  Ofcourse, I called Danielle and told her that we would soon be taking that big step as well.  You know how in high school, the football players stick with other football players?  The marching band marches together to the same beat?  The cheerleaders hang out in the same locker room?  Us infertiles have to stick together too, lol! ;) I have to admit, it was hard to be around the ones that repetitively tell you how easily pregnancy happened for them.  How their "husband can just look at them and get them pregnant." Or "it happened the very first try." ;).  Kudos to you girls! I just happen to not have that awesome trait in common with you all. Anyways, Danielle was a God send for me.  She gave me advice, encouragement, and support to start our new journey.  It meant so much to be able to talk to someone who had been down that road before.  She shared her experiences and gave me HOPE.  You see, friends, that's what I pray to give you all thoughout this blog.  HOPE, encouragement, love, and support.  Some women have trouble sharing their story, but let me tell you something. There is NOTHING to be shamed of.  You should hold that head up high and know that one day you will be a mom too. And you will get to tell your daughter or son how much they were wanted.  You can tell them how hard you fought to get them here.  In my opinion, that is something to be very proud of.
         Our Fertility clinic had sent home a thick, brown folder home with us at our last visit.  This packet included a mountain of paperwork, info on injections, ultrasounds, meds, and a price.  Any boy, was it a price.  I have to admit I cried again when I saw it.  $12,500.  We didn't have that kind of money.  So we just decided to do the only thing we knew to do. Pinch our pennies and save up to do it even if it took years.  Since starting fertility testing we had started a small savings, in case we had to anything super expensive like IUI or the big daddy...IVF.  However, we were on a small income.  I was at the beginning of my cosmetology career and Cody was in his last semester of WKU.  Everyone knows that in those first few years of marriage, there isn't a whole lot of money left to save at the end of each month.  Thank goodness my hubby was good at saving, we had a little less than half saved back in the sock drawer.  Winning! I knew I married him for a reason! ;)  However, it had taken FOREVER to save up that money.  And I knew it may take even longer to save up the rest. But we knew without a doubt that God would provide and give us the peace to endure those baby less years.   Little did we know, God's timing was even better than we expected...
        So, the next week we went to get our taxes done.  We had put it off until the last minute like always.  I know what you're thinking..."She's a procrastinator, and she has ADHD. What does taxes have to do with fertility?"  I have a point I promise ;)  As we were standing to leave our tax appointment, the lady stopped us and I will NEVER, EVER, forget what she said to us.  "Oh, wait guys.  I almost forgot to tell you, you all qualify for a first time home owners tax credit.  Your total credit will come to $7,500. you will receive it within 10 days. "  I stood still in my tracks.  I'm sure you can guess what happened next.  The ugly cry...again.  Did I mention I was a hot mess? :)  Wow, God, I hear you loud and clear.  You see, we had saved up $5,000 at that point.  It doesn't take a mathematician to see what that equals.  Yes! 5,000 plus 7,500 equals $12,500!  Praise, Jesus!  BOOYAH, haters, now tell me "God doesn't want me to have kids." Just kidding ;) Anyways, if that isn't a miracle, I'm not sure what is.  Cody and I looked at each other and we knew... we knew that was our answered prayer.  At that point, that was total confirmation that God was on our side and this was his plan for our lives.  Cody and I agreed that day we would take a leap of faith and call to set everything up, to officially begin our first round of IVF.  We didn't realize how fast things would move from there.  But we hopped on that roller coaster and never looked back!  And it was the best decision we have EVER made together.  That, my friends, is where our story really gets interesting.  That, is where the humor and emotions really begin...I promise to tell more next week!  
      
       Once again, I find myself typing at 2 am, mostly because I have been interrupted by my littlest miracle who just had a birthday this week! You remember that spare room?  That is where my Dax is sleeping right now! I have to get up early in the morning to head to...the fertility clinic! But first, I had to share a few pics my mom took of me doing one of my morning injections today.  Don't mind the bruising or the road map on my belly. ;) It may not be attractive, but, hey, I housed 3 babies in there.  By the way, mom told me to make that silly dramatic face, haha! :) Be watching for the next part of my story...And like always share it if you like it! 

                                   With love and BABY DUST,

                                                        Andi 

A not so "fertile myrtyle's" journey to a full house...

      So, here's the thing. I don't even know how to start this blog or this post, but I have wanted to blog for a couple years now. This may be a rambled mess of thoughts, because let's be honest,  I have mommy brain half the time and I am not the most organized person in the world either.  I am Andi.  I am a wife, stay at home/working momma, business owner, and children's photographer.  Of all those things, being a mommy is my favorite. (Sorry, Cody) I feel like I was totally born for this. God put me on this earth to rock babies, cuddle them, wipe snot, kiss boo boos, and raise awesome people to love Jesus...and their momma. Ok, their daddy too. And boy do I have a story for you. A story that I am not ashamed to tell. A story that I sometimes tell to complete strangers. A story of how those 3 sweet babies came into this world.  
      They didn't come into this world without many prayers, tests, needles, surgical procedures, and lots of money (and a drained savings account), and a petri dish.  But that brings us to where we are today. Meet Hudson, Paislee, and Baby Dax.

         Aren't they cute? :)  I could go on and on about my love for these 3. Ahhhhh, they are my heart. My whole world, my littlest loves. They were worth every shot, every tear, every heartbreaking negative pregnancy test, every penny. They are my whole world, and I would walk through fire for them. And I kind of did with all those hot flashes from the Lupron injections ;) (but we'll get into that later). They came into this world with the help of IVF and an amazing team of doctors, that I feel with my whole heart were guided and directed by God. How glad I am that I didn't listen to those who told me "Just adopt," or "Maybe God doesn't want you to have children." I know without any doubt, that IVF was part of our story from the beginning.  Through each of these processes, I have gained patience, a stronger marriage, and appreciation for motherhood and for life in general.  I would not change any of it. But here's the thing...our family isn't complete. Not that I am not content with what God has given me...Yes, we are super duper blessed beyond measure....and YES, we do have a beautiful girl and two handsome boys. So why, you ask? Why is our family not complete? Because we have 7 frozen embryos waiting for us. You see, they were all conceived at the same time. Pretty wild, huh? That is another story that I promise to tell later. I can only leave my eyelids open for so long at 2 am while typing this. ;)

   I have so many stories to tell about all things fertility, motherhood, and our journey.  I should actually write a book, and I actually hope to one day. That's on my bucket list. This blog is not meant to rant or complain about the obstacles of IVF. Because let's all be honest, who likes a negative nancy.  Nobody. Oh, I'm funny, haha.  Come on pregnant girls, we know you have morning sickness. But there are a million women who would love to hug that toilet with a smile on their face, because it would mean they had life growing inside of them. Hey my IVF ladies, I know the shots hurt. But look at it from this perspective...there are women that are working 2-3 jobs to save up for that process. Anyways, be thankful, always, don't take it for granted. My hope for this blog is to be a voice to those who are more private about their fertility journey. You have no idea how many women have emailed me to discuss fertility issues. And I am so passionate about discussing it and sharing our success stories with them.  As women, we should not be ashamed at an inability to conceive. We should love and support each other always. I hope this blog will encourage others to speak out.  There are more of us than you realize. You think that "multiple birth" boom just happens when the stars perfect align?   Some are just more open about it than others. And like I have said before, I am an open book.  

      Fertility is also a very emotional roller coaster. Due to a fluke in my recent injections (yes, we are on cycle #4), I have been a bit of a basket case these days.  I will sometimes cry out of no where, for no reason at all, totally beyond my control.  Hey, Hormones, you suck!  I hope to bring a little honesty and humor to the situation. By the way, I wish I had a photograph of the older man who saw me giving myself an injection in Walgreens parking lot today.  No, sir, I wasn't shooting up drugs, just hormones :).  I also want to document my life with 4 year old twins and an (almost) one year old along the way. Because trust me,  they are pretty funny too. This blog will have lots of grammatical errors, I'm sure. And lots of run-on sentences. So please don't judge. Just read and share. If I get a good response, I will blog often. Trust me, there are many stories yet to be told...  ;)

With love and baby dust,

Andi